A little prayer.

Today I received a sad news.

My best friend's brother in law collapse and he is now in ICU.

His condition is not very promising but having said that I'm always a pro-miracle, pro-prayers no matter how small the hope or chance is.

Praying for a miracle.

Love yourself

We cannot love others from an empty cup.

Why do you always go to the library? Is the question I often received.

This place is quiet. No chaos. Or at least people know the rules that they need to keep their business low. I mean have you ever sit beside someone at the library and amazed by how he/she tried to put things super slowly on the table?

It’s quite that you could even hear people flipping through their books. Zipping their bag or even the pencil case?

God knows the chaos in their heart or mind and yet they have to be as quiet as they can be.

This place is like my comfort place.

Growing up, I never heard my parents argue. Well maybe towards the final year of their life. But definitely not before that. I hated when people argue or fighting. It brings shiver down to my spine and heck, it terrifies me.

So yes. This place gives me buffer from the chaos house.

In order for me to be there for sister, I have to keep my sanity intact. I wouldn't be able to think let alone act when my head is messed up.

And no, it's not selfish to love yourself first.

Update

Here I am, not stranded but I'm here willingly.
With a hope, I could make a change, or the very least, aid it.
Probably too ambitious but heck, I thought that I could help my sister.

What's the outcome of these decisions? I asked myself.
I don't know really.  

I want to be optimistic about the current affair of my life but as gloomy as the autumn sky it seems, I would give it another try.

For at least, I give it a try.
In this case, I’ve given plenty of them.